Friday, November 20, 2009

Tis the Season

Salvation Army bell ringers. Yes, they serve a purpose. I appreciate the good they are doing for the world, but at the same time I am not ashamed to admit they are driving me bananas! And it's not even Thanksgiving yet!

They are posted at every entrance to every store, everywhere. They ring their bell and give me that look like, "Shouldn't you be putting money in my little red pot?" Now let's be honest, I'm walking into a store to spend money, so I should be putting money into the pot, but I don't. There are so many of them if I gave to one, I'd feel obligated to give to them all. I enjoy the people who say, "I'll catch you on the way out." Right.

Now, let's say I gave $1 to every bell ringer I saw. I'd be broke before Thanksgiving! Giving a dime to them all would be more reasonable, but can you imagine the look of disdain I would receive as my change plinked into the bucket. I think once you donate you should receive a button saying, "I donated."

And then there are those times when you think you've made an escape and managed to find that one door that's unattended. You see the bucket, but there's no ringer, so you quickly park and make a mad dash for the door. But then, out of nowhere, the ninja bell ringer appears as though they've been lurking in the shadows waiting for you.

And the incessant ringing! Can't they just agree to ring once a minute? Instead of the constant ringing, ringing, ringing. I know, tell us how you really feel, right? I'm just saying.

Whew. I feel better. Thanks. Now I'm going to go get a 4th job so I can afford the Salvation Army. Happy Holidays!

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